As I mentioned in "Perspective--Part 1" this is such a huge topic that I assumed it would take me more than one post to even begin to cover it. I was right. Part 1 really ended up being just an intro. I'm not even sure if I fully explained my purpose for using the "Sailor Kissing a Nurse" photo of the statue replication of the original photo. You do know that's the real name of the original photograph, right? The subject of the statue, while I think it's oh so cool, is not really part of my point. My point in using this pic with little me standing with my elbow on her foot was to demonstrate the perspective of how awesome and enormous this statue is in real life. From a distance, when you're driving toward the intersection where it stands, it looks big; but it's enormity is not appreciated until you actually get out of your car and walk up to it. It's huge, and it's really cool. Did I say that already? Your perspective changes as you get closer to it. Kind of like our perspective of how big God really is changes as we get closer to Him. Now I'm getting ahead of myself.
Our perspective in life can be affected by a variety of things--our past, our relationships, our right or wrong assumptions about everything going on around us...the list goes on and on. My earliest memory of what it means to have perspective takes me back to Algebra I in 8th grade. I did horrible in that class. I did great the next two years in Geometry and Algebra II, but Algebra I was not a great experience. I was not accustomed to getting anything less than a B and I barely passed this class. However, I think it was one of the greatest life lessons for me at such a young age. I remember at the age of 13 telling myself that in the picture of my life a bad grade in Algebra I in 8th grade was going to be so small. It would have no affect on my life as a whole and I really needed to not get so stressed out over it. Thirteen-year-old me was right and I'm glad I listened to her. Learning perspective at that age has been invaluable to me over the years. Jac has had the same opportunity this year in 7th grade Pre-Algebra. Like mother, like son.
I don't remember where I've heard this before, but you've probably heard of it too. A woman sees another person with a frown on her face and says to her, "Smile. Nothing can be that bad." We are sense-making individuals and when we see someone with a sour expression we can make assumptions about what he or she might be going through. We have no idea about the details of their lives and assume that it must be something trivial and a trite comment will make it all better. I kind of like to do the opposite just to exercise my compassion a little bit. If I see someone in a sour mood I like to imagine all of the different things it could be, i.e. just got a speeding ticket (wouldn't be so far-fetched for me), didn't get their full order in the drive through, tried to use a coupon that they didn't know had expired, just got laid off from their job, has an abusive husband, has a child with a life-threatening illness, just lost a loved one in a car accident, was just given a terminal diagnosis.... Do you see how the list of what someone might be going through can go from the slightly annoying to the tragic? We encounter people every day from all ends of this spectrum. When we look at someone and make assumptions about them based on their expression or demeanor we are doing them a true disservice. We see their anger and don't view it as the mask it is for their underlying fear. We see their arrogance and don't recognize that it's just a cover-up for their insecurities. We look at others every day and make judgments about them based on our own perspective from our own life experience. We need to exercise compassion and a little latitude once in a while. We don't always know the pain those around us are going through.
Having a healthy perspective in life regarding our own problems is a good thing. It allows us to not take ourselves so seriously. It seems there is always someone worse off than whatever you or I are going through. I look back to my miscarriage last spring and at the time it was difficult to permit myself to grieve because I had such guilt for even allowing myself an ounce of grief when I have three healthy children already. I had to come to the understanding that while others' devastation in this area is so much greater than mine I still experienced a loss, nonetheless. It just needed to be put in its proper perspective.
I've learned a lot about perspective by reading a little devotional book that my dear friend, Debbie, gave me. It's different than any other devotional I've read in that it's a book that is about women of great faith and the struggles they encountered in their lives. Talk about putting your own life in perspective and making you feel like you're just whining about nothing. Take for example Dorothy Carey. She was a missionary who lived from 1755-1807. Here's an excerpt from Jewell Johnson's book, "Daily Devotions for Women." "She initially refused to accompany her husband to India in 1793. She had recently lost a 2-year-old, she was three weeks away from delivering a child, and she had three older sons to raise. William wanted to at least take the Careys' oldest son with him. But when the ship's departure was delayed, Dorothy had a change of heart; she agreed to accompany her husband provided her sister also go with the party. Missionary work for the Careys in India is difficult to imagine. Compared to England's climate, the heat was oppressive. Poisonous snakes and fierce animals were a constant threat. Sadly Dorothy watched her husband labor for seven years before making a convert. But perhaps the hardest trial was when another son died and the Careys were forced to bury him themselves with only the remaining children at their side." Wow!! Imagine that kind of life. Incomprehensible sacrifices. The Scripture for that day is Psalm 56: 2-3: "Mine enemies would daily swallow me up: for they be many that fight against me, O thou most high. What time I am afraid I will trust in Thee." The Scripture for the day was about trusting in God and that's a great verse to go along with Dorothy Carey's story because she had to put her whole trust in God during her life. But, for me, her story gave me perspective on my own problems. I believe God gives more grace when it is needed. His Word says that His grace is sufficient for us. That means that when we put our trust in Him, regardless of our circumstances, He will give us the measure of grace that we need to be victorious in spite of what we're going through out and how we feel about it.
At the end of "Perspective--Part 1" I wrote, "I think we let ourselves stress over things that really shouldn't be stressors in our lives. It's all about perspective, how we choose to frame our circumstances and our attitude regarding our circumstances." I think this sentence really encapsulates the true meaning of having perspective. Sometimes we need to "get over ourselves," learn to trust God and choose an attitude that is pleasing to Him. If we learn to trust Him we can find His peace even in the midst of the storm. When we choose to grow closer to Him, just like driving closer to that statue and then walking up to it, He just gets bigger and bigger and our problems get smaller and smaller. He desires for you to lean on Him. In doing so, He will put your life in proper perspective as He shows you how great His love is for you. Try it. You won't be sorry.
Love and a healthy perspective to all.
Summer 2012
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Vermont Fashion...Where Is It??
Whenever I travel I like to identify what the fashion trend is for the locals in the area. Not too difficult, just be observant and take note of what most people seem to be wearing. Here are some examples. When I was on vacation in Charleston, SC a few years ago I realized that to be fashionable I would need an assortment of strapless halter dresses. I don't think I saw any woman under the age of 50 who wasn't sporting one. A couple years ago Lindy and I went to Miami, FL for a weekend conference and I discovered that skinny jeans are required attire there. Young, old, male, female...it matters not. If you want to "fit in" in Miami then you better "fit in" to skinny jeans. I'm not a big fan of skinny jeans so I don't think I would have fared well there. In Chicago you have to tuck your jeans or pants into tall boots. It doesn't matter what color the boots are or if you are wearing jeans or pants, you just better tuck them in. Jenn was in high style as she brought her cute riding boots and did the tuck in. She looked like a local.
Now, in Vermont, I've discovered a commonality and if you're from Vermont you might not appreciate it too much. I apologize for that ahead of time. I'm not trying to offend anyone, and I don't personally know anyone from Vermont, so I'm just making an observation. People in Vermont are very plain looking. By "plain looking" I mean that there is nothing flashy about Vermonters--as far as I have seen. No makeup, no highlights, not much thought put into clothing. They are very "granola" or "natural," I guess you could say. This, of course, is the exact opposite of me. I told Lindy that if I lived here I would be known as "the pretty one.". He said that, really, people would take one look at me and say, "She's not from around here.". As a disclaimer I should let you know that we are in rural Vermont and the landscape is beautiful...the people, not so much.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and they probably think me odd with my lipstick and mascara and colorful scarves and what have you. I am definitely in the minority here.
That's all for now.
Now, in Vermont, I've discovered a commonality and if you're from Vermont you might not appreciate it too much. I apologize for that ahead of time. I'm not trying to offend anyone, and I don't personally know anyone from Vermont, so I'm just making an observation. People in Vermont are very plain looking. By "plain looking" I mean that there is nothing flashy about Vermonters--as far as I have seen. No makeup, no highlights, not much thought put into clothing. They are very "granola" or "natural," I guess you could say. This, of course, is the exact opposite of me. I told Lindy that if I lived here I would be known as "the pretty one.". He said that, really, people would take one look at me and say, "She's not from around here.". As a disclaimer I should let you know that we are in rural Vermont and the landscape is beautiful...the people, not so much.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and they probably think me odd with my lipstick and mascara and colorful scarves and what have you. I am definitely in the minority here.
That's all for now.
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Perspective--Part 1
Perspective. Part 1. When you read that title you were probably thinking that "Part 1" means there is probably going to eventually be a "Part 2" or 3 or 4 or.... Well, I think you'll be right even though I don't have any thoughts swirling for a Part 2. The idea of having perspective is just such a big concept to me and something that I really dwell on a lot that I think my little brain probably has more than one blog post in there on this subject. I tried to go back through my blog and look to see if I ever posted anything about perspective, but I'm so blogger naive that I wasn't able to figure out how to do that. So, I guess if I don't even remember blogging about this before then hopefully you don't either.
Yesterday I posted a picture on Facebook and said that I was contemplating a new blog post and didn't think anyone would guess what it was going to be about. Guess what!! No one got it right. I really didn't think anyone would even try to guess but right away there were comments firing in. Here's the picture I posted:
Here are the guesses from my friends: "Sanctity," "shoes," "your parents," "love conquering the will over to complete trust," the bygone days of uniforms and WHITE SHOES," "something to do with nursing," "World War II," "love," "trips to Flora," "spontaneous kisses."
I love it!! One little picture and a lot of different perspectives on it. I didn't have the forethought that I would use the comments I received on that picture to illustrate my point. I was only thinking of the picture itself to illustrate my point. But, since my friends are so creative and generous with their comments then I couldn't leave them out. What does this picture have to do with perspective, you ask? Well, first of all if you've been alive for 20 years or more then you've probably seen the photograph of this image from the end of World War II. You might not have seen the enormous, awe-inspiring statue replication that is located in Sarasota, Florida. So, if you were thinking, "I've seen that image before but I don't remember grass being in it" then you probably also didn't notice the person standing with her elbow propped on the nurse's heel. Look a little closer.
See her now? Yep, that's me in my fabulous summertime maxi dress. I love that dress and I am missing getting to wear it along with my other summer clothes. Anyway, I'm digressing on the dress. Summer fashion is not what this post is all about. Perspective is what it's all about.
The idea of perspective is something that I contemplate quite a bit. I think I have a healthy dose of it due to working in hospice for all these years. My problems can seem really petty when they are held up against a young mother my age trying to find the words to say to her children who will grow up with her as a fading memory. Hearing about others coping with loss--loss of independence, loss of relationships due to advancing disease or dementia, loss of function, loss of...--is something I encounter every day. My appreciation for these families and the hospice staff who cares for them grows with each passing year.
I was talking with one of my co-workers recently and we were chatting, as we often do, about our latest plan to lose that elusive last 10 pounds. Gia and I have worked together for more than 10 years. It was after Christmas and I think the conversation had something to do with cookies. We talked about the battle of wanting to lose those last pounds but also wanting to eat cookies. I said something like, "Gia, do you think a patient our age who is faced with losing everything would wish she had denied herself the cookies and lost those last ten pounds? No. She would say that life is too short. Eat the cookies!!". Now I'm not an advocate for gluttony but I think we do let ourselves stress over things that really shouldn't be stressors in our lives. It's all about perspective, how we choose to frame our circumstances and our attitude regarding our circumstances.
Well, I guess Part 1 is really more of an intro than a Part 1. I have a whole lot more to say on this subject but it's been a while since I last posted so I want to get this one out there to get your juices flowing on this subject. Take a step back and think about the importance you place on various circumstances in your life. Are they really worthy of your stress and frustration over them?
More later.
Love to all.
Yesterday I posted a picture on Facebook and said that I was contemplating a new blog post and didn't think anyone would guess what it was going to be about. Guess what!! No one got it right. I really didn't think anyone would even try to guess but right away there were comments firing in. Here's the picture I posted:
Here are the guesses from my friends: "Sanctity," "shoes," "your parents," "love conquering the will over to complete trust," the bygone days of uniforms and WHITE SHOES," "something to do with nursing," "World War II," "love," "trips to Flora," "spontaneous kisses."
I love it!! One little picture and a lot of different perspectives on it. I didn't have the forethought that I would use the comments I received on that picture to illustrate my point. I was only thinking of the picture itself to illustrate my point. But, since my friends are so creative and generous with their comments then I couldn't leave them out. What does this picture have to do with perspective, you ask? Well, first of all if you've been alive for 20 years or more then you've probably seen the photograph of this image from the end of World War II. You might not have seen the enormous, awe-inspiring statue replication that is located in Sarasota, Florida. So, if you were thinking, "I've seen that image before but I don't remember grass being in it" then you probably also didn't notice the person standing with her elbow propped on the nurse's heel. Look a little closer.
See her now? Yep, that's me in my fabulous summertime maxi dress. I love that dress and I am missing getting to wear it along with my other summer clothes. Anyway, I'm digressing on the dress. Summer fashion is not what this post is all about. Perspective is what it's all about.
The idea of perspective is something that I contemplate quite a bit. I think I have a healthy dose of it due to working in hospice for all these years. My problems can seem really petty when they are held up against a young mother my age trying to find the words to say to her children who will grow up with her as a fading memory. Hearing about others coping with loss--loss of independence, loss of relationships due to advancing disease or dementia, loss of function, loss of...--is something I encounter every day. My appreciation for these families and the hospice staff who cares for them grows with each passing year.
I was talking with one of my co-workers recently and we were chatting, as we often do, about our latest plan to lose that elusive last 10 pounds. Gia and I have worked together for more than 10 years. It was after Christmas and I think the conversation had something to do with cookies. We talked about the battle of wanting to lose those last pounds but also wanting to eat cookies. I said something like, "Gia, do you think a patient our age who is faced with losing everything would wish she had denied herself the cookies and lost those last ten pounds? No. She would say that life is too short. Eat the cookies!!". Now I'm not an advocate for gluttony but I think we do let ourselves stress over things that really shouldn't be stressors in our lives. It's all about perspective, how we choose to frame our circumstances and our attitude regarding our circumstances.
Well, I guess Part 1 is really more of an intro than a Part 1. I have a whole lot more to say on this subject but it's been a while since I last posted so I want to get this one out there to get your juices flowing on this subject. Take a step back and think about the importance you place on various circumstances in your life. Are they really worthy of your stress and frustration over them?
More later.
Love to all.
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